Live music can no longer be played in public without it being called a music festival, researchers have found. The research, published by academics from a university somewhere in the British Isles, found that even a man playing a flute badly in a town centre results in people setting up stalls selling pints of overpriced, watered down Carling and the local council putting up a marquee and calling it a ‘family friendly zone’.
The news comes after a group of Bolivians playing panpipes in Manchester city centre complained about large groups of people displaying ‘festival like behaviour’ whenever they perform. One of the Bolivians said, “One bloke pissed in a cup and threw it up Market Street and then Dodgy turned up and told us they were ‘on after us’.”
Whilst some have complained about the prevalence of music festivals, bands such as Travis, Rialto and Shed Seven have welcomed the development as it means they’re headlining more festivals now than they ever did at the height of their commercial success.