‘Standing silently during national anthem’ ousts ‘being Scottish’ from the top of the Daily Mail faux outrage league table, whilst doing unspeakable things to pigs fails to make the top 100

The Daily Mail’s annual faux outrage league table has been published with ‘anger at someone standing silently in a respectful manner during the national anthem’ going straight in at number one among a top 100 list of things you should get really, really cross about. It knocks ‘somebody being Scottish’, which topped the 2013 and…

DAILY EXPRESS: VOTE GREEN OR EARTH WILL PERISH

In a sudden change of heart the Daily Express ‘newspaper’ is backing a Green Party surge, ahead of Thursday’s general election. An editorial says the paper backs the party’s anti-austerity agenda and in particular agrees with their concerns about the environment and need for urgent action to address climate change. The editorial states, “The Green…

Danny Alexander rediscovers backbone whilst searching for the long lost treasure of One Eyed Willie

Alexander and his friends were searching for treasure using a Spanish treasure map they found in the attic. Lib Dem Treasury spokesperson Danny Alexander has revealed he accidently stumbled across his backbone last night. The Beaker lookalike, who has revealed Tory plans to cut Child Benefit in today’s Guardian, says he misplaced his backbone about…